It have been sometime …

I have not been writing for some time and today what i am going to write here, i hope that whoever read this will help me to keep it within this Journal itself and will not talk about it to anyone, including myself ….. i thank you for that in advance …..

Recently, i found that i have lost the joy of serving and with that, i decided to give myself until March to regain that joy and if i did not regain that simple joy, i will drop all my ministries to seek God ……. of course i will not be a irresponsible person, for every ministries i am in, this three months, i will find suitable people to replace …. currently, for the Hope resources side, i have already found Eugene and Nu to help, as for Evaxs, i might pass the vision God have given me to Kevin and the role of Co-ordinator to Melissa. I think the most worrying thing for me right now is who to take care of my sheeps. At least Sam is going back so that left Tom. I have to wait and see …. as for the counting of attendance, i don’t think it will be a great problem to find replacement. I will also leave JG and Membership if by that time, i still could not get back the same joy …. i will also stop Shepherding lessons for myself ….

I am not leaving God, it is just that i wanted to go back to the old time when i can really really seek and understand God on a more personal level and to find out what He really really want …. I don’t know when i will be back but i hope to be back a much stronger and a more joyful and a more biblical person ….. I really really love this Church and the people in it ……… It is just that i don’t want to fake the joy that is suppose to be in me ….. to look happy and to look joyful when actually i am not ….. Again why i choose March is because i believe i will be taking over some of the people who are going back responsibility. And by March, most people will be back …..

I hope that my decision will not come to pass and i will regain that Joy and Peace of serving once more …….